Difficult Wedding Decisions: The Hardest Part of Planning

difficult wedding decisions couple holding wooden cut-outs of two love birds wit the words we do

Difficult wedding decisions are the most toughest aspects of planning your nuptials, so here is some great planning advice at your fingertips. Organising the happiest days of your life should be fun but amidst the mayhem it’s become complicated.

However arranging a wedding it isn’t rocket science, brain surgery and you don’t require high-tech organizational skills. But, the pandemic is real. Do you agree?

So, how do you maintain the intimacy and stay sane during this horrible crisis? How can you overcome joint challenges? More importantly, how do you take action to curb the frustrations? Use these questions to gage your feelings to keep any struggles and upsets at bay. Let’s look at 20 bonding moments that are bound to arise.


How to bond closer during Covid-19 new wedding culture rules

wedding flower ideas bridemaids and groom with translucent bouquets

“Serious-minded men are more susceptible to wedding stress than sensible women. And this recurrent part of planning can cause irritations, frustrations and anguish.” Source: English-wedding.com.

image Wedding Fashion Finds


Here’s the deal…are you bouncing wedding plans back and forth with each other? Does it feel like a fun new ball game? Or a competitive war, a battle of wits and a power play. But be aware, it’s corona time, so it’s inevitable you and the H2B may be split over the budget. Iron out the kinks to improve your view. How? Be fair and compromise on stuff!


Secondly, difficult wedding decisions cause stress. You’ll ask questions about blending family traditions with your modern day cool ideas. Are you catholic, protestant, christian or an atheist? Do you want a wedding party/bridal shower? Perhaps you prefer a mix of traditional and contemporary. Whatever you decide. Sort it out now!


By the same token, are you brawling about a registered civil partnership? Are you reluctant to host a non-religious commitment ceremony? Do you and your partner prefer a traditional white wedding? Well, if you struggle with the aesthetics, fixtures and features  of the big day, don’t pigeonhole your ideas. Speak your mind and make radical decisions.

mixed-raced couple wedding couple sitting in a hay field man kissing woman on the head

RADICAL WEDDING DECISIONS: That’s when, mix-ups, minor stuff and misunderstandings can occur. Along with doubts, regrets, stupid mistakes and trivial arguments, you have a lot on your wedding planning plate.

image: mikeyblueeyes


But look at what marriage really means to you. Do you desire a traditional church wedding? Or do you want a ceremonial marriage ceremony?  Are you dreaming about throwing the bouquet and showing off your garter? Well, you can have your cake and eat it to. So, find out how to merge your strong moral values and hopes for the future. Ask important per-marriage questions.


With the above in mind, are you quarreling about seeking parental approval? Well, you and your partner’s unvarnished opinions, the family and in-law feuds could put you in a predicament. You’ll have to face the tough decisions about having an intimate wedding.  Just be transparent about what you desire and don’t worry about disappointing close relatives. So, will you shun or appease?


One way or another, you need to decide if you want an unplugged wedding. What does it mean? It means tech-free, no phones or social media during the big day. Banning these high-tech items ensures that what ever happens at your marriage celebrations, stays there. And interfering parents or in-laws don’t have to feel embarrassed or intimidated about what went down.


So, this could be a tricky one. Do you have a guest list full of family, friends and their kids? You could be stressed out about inviting the extra additions and concerned about certain members attending the wedding. Don’t worry,  get the wedding guest list out, snuggle up together on the couch with a glass of wine, and be realistic about the headcount.

difficult wedding decisions couple holding wooden cut-outs of two love birds wit the words we do

Have you planned a bridal gown session? Do you desire a traditional pure white gown? Perhaps a typical off-white wedding dress or modern jumpsuit is more to your liking. It’s your big day, use the lock down period to break away from the stereotypical and long-established customs.


Do you want an open bar? Or do you have mixed heritage family, and prefer wine & beer only party? How important is your cultural, spiritual/religious beliefs? What about your upbringing and background differences? Let’s face it, if you are a drinker, non-drinker or on the wagon you should use a wedding alcohol calculator to plan everyone’s booze needs carefully.


So, are you doubting your future together? Perhaps you need to look at your wedding expectations. Being in the spotlight on the big day could be another difficult wedding issue to deal with; personality clashes and social anxiety could be worrying you. Perhaps you prefer an elopement wedding?


Would you sacrifice your personal wishes to create the perfect wedding day? Overcome your fears and refuse point-black to budge. Again, finding a happy medium with one another is the key answer to a relaxed and carefree marriage ceremony. Find a location that suits you both.

difficult wedding decisions silver cutlery white serviettes, wine glasses and lavender in a jar on a table

Difficult wedding decisions can lead to tunnel vision. Choose a commitment ceremony, symbolic marriage or alternative ritual now. Or get officially married and once the Covid-19 regulations have been relaxed, plan a big bash. Don’t let the hustle, bustle trap get you down.



So, what is the important conversation you must have about your nuptials? Is it the wedding registry or bridal gown? Like it or not a wedding registry can be one of the biggest headaches to setup and plan. If you’re partial to a particular item, stick to your guns. Ping pong ideas back and forth but make sure it doesn’t clash with what you already have at home.


During your bridal gown session, searching for a wedding venue, and the perfect honeymoon you realise your funds are low. What do you do? Break your wedding budget or tactfully ask friends and family for money in lieu of gifts? Well, don’t worry about picking out pots and pans you don’t need, check out my tips to start saving towards something you really want.

smartly dressed men in dark suits with hands crossed looking sharp

Tuxedo or fitted suit, that is the question? Your groom’s attire formalizes the ceremony and could be the tipping point of your wedding. Get online now is the time to visit a reputable wedding suit shop such as www.theblacktux.com.



Equally important, what is the wedding aesthetics/style? And the colour of the suit he should wear? Usually the traditional colours are:

  • Deep black
  • Dark blue
  • Rich burgundy
  • Or warm grey


Do you have a wedding etiquette code? Do you dream of wearing a white wedding dress or are you feeling like something bright and bold? Well, whatever your wedding mood set a dress code.  Avoid the big expense of the typical laced gown. Go for something that totally flatters your curves, skin tone and speaks louder than words!


Would you whittle down your guest list to avoid a difficult wedding decision? Albeit your in-laws, wedding guests or other invitees are vital for making your day a triumphant success.  You could arrange an open seating plan and ensure their presence completes the ambiance at your wedding.


To sum up, let’s not sugar coat things, Covid-19 is here to stay, we have to live with it! So, don’t get mad get even. Tackle the difficult wedding decisions. Namely, if push comes to shove just see it as a challenge to create something uniquely yours. You’ve got time on your hands right? Basically, forget the drama and remember you’re in this love together.

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Over to you…..

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About Clover Jean: I'm a Londoner based in Amsterdam, the Netherlands. Being a ceremonial wedding - symbolic marriage officiant with a gospel & soul choir is rewarding work. So, my guilty pleasures are fine dining, travel hot spots and on-line retail therapy. What's yours? Get in touch, via Instagram #cloverjeanamsterdam or Facebook. LIKE, SHARE, SPREAD THE LOVE & see you soon!

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